Got Married!

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I got married April 27, 2013, to my beloved wife Julianna.

Whew – what an experience. It’s subtle, being married. I feel a sense of calmness, patience, and internal peace. Sanguine. I feel sanguine.

Even though nothing in the business has really changed, my outlook definitely changed. I can tell I’m sleeping better, eating better, dealing with the stress better. In general, life is more enjoyable.

And it’s not just because I don’t have the stress of planning a wedding (which, on top of being expensive, is practically a second job, folks…) There’s something more in my life,  and that in turn makes me “more”, and that makes everything else relatively smaller/manageable. DOM & TOM is ceasing to be this monolithic entity that dwells over all parts of my life. Wow ,that sounds negative, but small-business owners you know what I’m talking about – the first few years working in your business is all-consuming. The cycle of eat, work, sleep, repeat is a tough one to break. Sometimes you stare into the abyss and wonder if it’s staring back.  Thankfully, a good life-milestone with proper pomp and rituals, came along and I was able get perspective.

So to all those entrepreneurs and small business owners who are engaged – get excited! This is a blast.

 

My 1st vacation in 3 years…

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I’ve been on vacation for two weeks for the first time starting the company with Dominic, back in 2010.

Here’s what I’ve learned.

1.)  Being on vacation is BUSY

Look, my life was this  “get up, work 12-15 hours, and go to bed. Repeat.” The list of “Things I’m going to do when I get a free week….” grew by reams. In the last week alone I went to two art openings , a poetry-reading, visited four friends in the city (and yes, some I haven’t seen in years, even though they’re only 5 miles away), caught up with almost all my wedding duties, did-the-laundry (whew) and swung over a few evenings to John Brown Smokehouse, my favorite BBQ place. I was worried that a vacation would mean me sitting around all day, doing nothing. Just the opposite!

2.) Being on vacation is normal.

While I’m still busy, I’m moving MUCH more slowly. And I think moving slow is what it’s like to be normal. It’s about a quarter-speed to what I’m used to.  Any business owner (or highly-active manager) knows what I’m talking about. At work, the morning will vanish in 2 cups of coffee.  On vacation, an hour goes by in a slow, thundering, drum. It was/is jarring .  But some perks –  I actually remember things because there’s time to reflect and remember things. I can hold a conversation, on a set topic and just be present for that time/space. My mind isn’t wandering. I’m able to focus and not multi-task.

In fact, I learned that multi-tasking is the false prophet of efficiency – we’re just accomplishing less on more activities than ever. It’s a valuable lesson I’m taking back with me to the office.

3.) I’m learning something new.

I realized I hadn’t *learned* anything of substance for over three years. What I mean, yes, “Life is a great teacher…” etc whatever – I learned a lot starting/growing a business for 3 years. But I’m talking about reading a new book, going to see new art, researching Byzantine theologians from the 8th century – you know, something non-work. In general, since I graduated from Baruch College I haven’t taken a real academic course or learned much of classic studies. Going on vacation actually let me have time to pursue hobbies! I’m actually reading new non-work books,  and doing non-work things. It’s amazing how much of one’s relationships with friends and family centered around work.

Anyone else out there taken a vacation for the first time, in a LONG time? Love to hear your insights!

Be Better, Do Better – and what that really means.

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Dom and I have a company that grew 100% last year. This year, we’re looking at it growing around 50%, on the conservative side. This rapid growth is happening in ALL directions – costs, revenue, personnel, space, and presence. It’s tremendous. It’s what any business owner would want to happen. Dom and I are unbelievably lucky and grateful.

But the pressures are enormous. My underlying conceit is that if the company grows 100%, the people in it need to growth 100%. It’s a lot to ask –  who can honestly say that they are able to grow 100% each year? What does that really mean? What if someone just – oh, I don’t know – grows 50%? Is that good enough?

That’s a logical fallacy that I fell into for the past year. Me = my company. My success = my company’s success. My health = company’s health. Living like that will drive a heart attack eventually.

DOM & TOM’s company motto is “Do Good, Be Good”. The internal manta for me was a variation – “Be Better, Do Better.” I took that to mean that I needed to be a better manager, a better leader, and a more-morale creature. And the pressure just increased because of it. And then, after thorough discussions with Julie and my friends, the reality is that I just need be a well-rested, stable me. No matter what the capitalists say, continued rapid growth is neither sustainable nor always desirable.

The challenge we all face that the person we are today is creating the person we need to be tomorrow. I’ve never met Future Tom, but I hope I’m doing the things today to make sure he’s ready for tomorrow’s challenges. I also hope he’s happy, well-rested, likes his tea, and takes time with the things that makes him happy rather than anxious. That’s the source of being better and really doing good.

 

 

 

Form a confederacy of colleagues

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While in London, I met an interesting character in charge of a LARGE corporation’s digital production division.

Quick bio: Developer in his early 20’s, in charge of pivoting a legacy team into new technology, without any support or guidance on how to make a new business model (which was theoretical) work.

He’s been doing a tremendous job, day-to-day. He has a good internal team working on the problems, ancillary divisions – from Marketing to Sales to Pre-production –  are all pitching in, and he’s putting in the hours to do his homework on the industry. He’s flying out to conferences and attending the local ones held by industry leaders.

Once this character met all the smart people in his competing companies, he found out two things

1.) They were just as young as him

2.) They knew just as much as he did, more or less

So he did the smartest thing ever: He started a “happy hour” at a local pub; industry-specialists only.

In ye olden times, this was considered “networking”.  Networking is a great activity and like all great things in life, they’re eventually tainted by schmoozers. This did not happen for our hero in London. This man formed what became a concert of colleagues and friends. They spent weeks knocking back pints and trying to figure out massive problems. They weren’t looking for gigs or swapping stories, they were debating and thinking. This variety of people, many who our hero did not know, became friends and through the course of debating matters and making discoveries, they pulled others into their circle and formed alliances, and mentors entered the mix, and it became a powerful confederacy of industry experts.

It worked out well. It’s working out well. They’re meeting, every week, and solving problems in London.

I want to do this in NYC, and I think I’m going to push for a good happy-hour location in the late spring. Moreover, if you’re young and just starting the scene, I’d recommend doing this ASAP.  Anyone got a place they suggest? Thinking General Assemb.ly but that might be too packed at this stage. A little too much noise and not enough signal.

What to do when you hire someone better than yourself….

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As one of the founders of a company that is entering it’s 4th year, I’ve had the unanticipated pleasure of attracting talent that is excellent. I mean, the caliber of people are super. Frankly, they’re better at my job than I am at my job. Jeff Stewart from Lenddo passed on some wisdom that I guess is “standard knowledge” of the start-up world – a CEO’s job is to replace himself, constantly. I’ve felt strongly that in the past year this has happened at D&T, and some top-talent hires have gone better than others. So here’s a few things I’ve learned along the way.

Here’s a few DO’s/DON’T’s for start-ups

DO’S

1.) Be Ready!  Make sure you have everything ready for that person, a week before he/she needs it. No matter how talented, there’s always a ramp-up period whereby it’s important for this all-star has access to you and to their management team.

2.) Inform your people! Make sure your team knows that this person is awesome, and a much-valued team-member that will make huge/dramatic changes and improvements to the company. Living nebulous is dangerous for the new person, as the organization chart will shift drastically, especially in start-ups.

3.) Celebrate! Make sure you buy yourself a beer for building a business that attracts top-talent. That’s a mark of success – attracting capable people to business.

DON’TS

1.) Don’t compete! You, as the owner/lateral manager/legacy employee do not need to compete against the newbie. In my first hires, I felt like I was competing against the guy who was replacing me from my former duties. Moreover, I was steamrolling the person and just creating more havoc and work for everyone. Plus, I undermined the newbie’s authority. Painful less learned.

2.) Don’t take credit! You already are good at what you’re doing. Do those new responsibilities that you’re assigned to do well, and don’t take credit for the success of those below/lateral/above to you.

3.) Don’t get fired! This is a bit facetious, as a co-founder it’s pretty much impossible to be fired by a subordinate. But the figurative meaning is that you don’t just rest on your laurels, and gradually cede all responsibility/authority to those around you. Effectively kicking back, and letting others do the big work. You have important work to do, and the newbie was hired so you can do more of it, not less.

These are just some quick tips. Hopefully y’all feel they’re helpful. I’d love to hear back from the community and add to the list, so please feel free to comment!

 

 

 

Products vs Services – another thought to it.

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I’ve said it in previous posts, but I do prefer people (service) based business better than product based businesses. I don’t get emotionally invested in design specs, user-experience, or technical functionalities. I could care less about product roll-outs, additional feature plans, marketing/packaging, etc.

Personally, I’d rather go out to dinner with a client and have great conversations with them, invite them out to parties, meet their families, etc than provide service to fifty clients I’ll never meet. I just don’t find any job satisfaction make fifty sales and not knowing why or what happened, or anything tangible.

Dom loves products. He loves the process of conception to completion, the iterations, the optimization, all the goodness in building something from nothing. At the end of the day, he looks at what he built and THAT is the satisfaction. Conversely, projects come and projects go, and there’s nothing at the end of the day to show for it. Nothing that we – D&T – own.

I think we complement each other uniquely because of those two generic passions. Dom’s passion for the products we build make him the best person to work with clients on their projects. He makes it personal. As for me, I care more about the relationships grown. As I look at the D&T family, I would say it’s split down the middle with two camps, all pulling in the same fashion. With both halves, we produce a pretty great service/product/experience.

It's like a hotel - the experience is essentially the product.

 

 

 

Hi, it’s been awhile…

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Hi Friends,

It’s been awhile since last I updated the blog.

The reason? Stress.

I’m buried under tremendous work from all angles. It’s the trials and tribulations of a small business that is growing quickly. I’ve come to realize a few things…

Here’s my personal stance in life, for this generation, for the world we live in right now:

  • There’s a lot of people out there that don’t know what they want.
  • Ages 18-26 is for people to figure out what they want
  • Anyone past the age of 27 better have a plan, because knowing what you want is tough but there’s nothing harder than pursuing what you want

Case in point: Rocky Balboa http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3wuXyOUKJw

If you know what you’re worth, go out and get what you’re worth. I promise you, whatever it is you want to do is scarier, harder, and more emotionally draining than you can ever imagine. It’s also worth it. 100% guarantee you it’s worth it. But there will be times when all your skills, mettle, and fortitude will not be up to the task, and the only thing that will carry you through the day is your raw passion and love for what you do. This is your life. It’s time to get mad/excited/crazy/passionate/emotional/you. Get you 100%. Plug in today. And tomorrow. Stop with the numbing agents in your life – television, drinking, cooking blogs, whatever it is.

I’ve been off the grid for a long time to take care of life. I’m back now, and I’m back with a mission. To make sure that what I love to do is the best it can be, and the people I share that love are the best they can be. If you have wondered if I was going to be back, the wonder is over. I’m back and it’s going to be great.

much love,

 

A face to love

 

Kickboxing and the paunchy kid

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I’m kickboxing in the mornings and I’m damaged goods. My knuckles are bruised, my thighs are sore, and my knees are skinned.

In theory, I’ll start losing my paunch. And I’m the paunchy kid.

Kicking/Punching a bag is not as therapeutic as I was led to believe. I don’t channel my stress into the bag; I just get sore and tired. Moreover, I don’t really feel healthier afterwards or days after. I’ll let you know if there’s a change in my mentality regarding it, but currently it’s pretty un-exciting.

This is the right thing for me, though. Hitting 30, I need to keep active otherwise I’ll expand out. My waistline is already extending….ever so slightly. And there’s my paunch. My ever-so-lovely paunch that used to be a six-pack, back when I was 1/2 my age.

There is no business-minded analogy that I’m going to thread in this post. Sure I could say “healthy body, healthy mind” or “doing the right thing isn’t easy” or some other platitude. But really, I’m just talking about exercising and why I don’t like it. I’ve…..never liked it. Not when I was a teenager, not when I was a young adult, and not now. I love being able to do athletic THINGS (swimming, kayaking, etc). But exercising…never. And it amazes me because in the back of my mind I sort of bought into the promise that if you do something long enough, consistently, you learn to love it.

And that’s just not true. I probably will always hate exercise.

I'm a sad, paunchy Kid.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wish he was here. He'd know what to do....

Pride with Extreme Prejudice

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I think there’s too much pride, but not enough to be proud of, in a majority of our daily lives.

Pride should be a rare commodity. Being proud should be a spiritual goal.

I want to make that word and the emotion one feels from having it to have meaning.

To be clear: I’m not griping about self-indulgent, self-entitled behavior. I’m talking about taking stock in our lives and really summing up what is worth being proud of, and what we would like to be proud of in the future. What is meaningful? What do we consider an accomplishment?

In that vein, we should stop the thinking of pride like “being proud to be an American”, or “proud to be Gay”, or pride for our sports teams.

Civic pride is another matter, and perhaps doesn’t fit in with what I’m saying. So lets just ignore that for now….

Here’s a thought: If your life is a bookshelf filled with momentos and trinkets, the few things you’re proud of should sit on one shelf.

What do you think?

Your business card is crap!

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I have just been turned on by the magical character that is Joel Bauer.

His business card is dice-cut, embossed, has a pop-up in it, and foil-wrapped. It’s a square so you can’t fit it in your pocket, but it looks like a GREAT coaster (super-thick card stock, so I’m assuming great absorption…)

Joel Bauer is self-made rich. He’s self-made successful. He makes a living convincing people that he’s so excellent at training THEM to sell. People swear that he’s helped them in their lives.

Here’s the link to a video of Joel telling you your business card is crap. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_OtzL1xUiY

Here’s the contrast of another self-made rich/successful entertainer who’s business card is, according to Joel,  crap

 

Steve Martin - a studious PR man himself. He already provides his own spin...

Personally, I think we all like Steve Martin more than Joel. But I think I like Joel’s fans more than Steve. Joel Bauer appeals to a segment of people who are highly energized and motivated. People who are looking to change the world and want a plan/formula/strategy to make that happen. Snake oil salesmen or not, Joel’s convincing people everyday to be/do better (DGBG!) and, through his polished-sleaziness, his sermons seems to hit home. People are seeing results. Steve Martin plays the banjo and has good taste in modern art….and provides residual entertainment on his twitterfeed. I’d love to create crawfish with Steve, but Joel is inspiring a legion of people, any of whom I’d love to join of my team.

Plus, I think he’d like my business card.